literature

A Scholarly Role Reversal

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Literature Text

I entered his house just as his parents were leaving for work in the morning.  Whether he had left for the farm for the week or he had moved out to live closer to Toronto's club district was beyond me, but for whatever reason, I believed him not to be home.  I lurked around the house, choosing first to delve for treasures in the kitchen, and then to finish the sudoku puzzle left half completed on the living room table.  

I ventured upstairs for curiosity's sake, but my curiosity was not so easily satiated.  It kept kneading me until I grew soft and opened the door to the basement.  Darkness looked out at me from the furnished cave below, and my whole body quaked with adventure.  I was half way down the steep stairway when I was startled to see his naked back.  

There he was, quietly sitting on his carpeted floor wearing nothing but a pair of jeans.  I gasped in surprise, shaken and panicked to have been caught wandering into his room.  My sudden intake of air only served to alert him to my presence.  He turned his body quickly to find me frozen in place on the stairs.  "I'm sorry," I managed to say.  "I didn't know you were here...I was just looking to reset the internet and I thought that perhaps the router n' stuff was down here..."

I hoped he wouldn't see thought my excuse.  If he did, there was no mention of it.  "I didn't know you'd be here either.  The internet stuff is in the upstairs computer room."

I could have left him to himself at this point, but there he was, the elusive party boy, and I knew that if I did not say something, it might be another forever before our paths crossed again.  "You seem happy--happier than normal," I told him.

I sat down beside him as he spoke.  "I'm pretty involved in my classes," he admitted.

"Classes?" I asked, wondering if I had truly heard him correctly.

"Yes.  I just started my first year of pre-med.  Right now I'm going over Calculus, Physics, and Chemistry."

I wanted to tell him to escape, that pre-med was terrible.  Beside him lay old text books and piles of old fashioned pen and paper notes.  "Huh, you're taking what I was taking.  Congrats on conquering all that math!"

"I'm taking what you were taking? As in...you're not taking it anymore?"

"Nope, I quit!  I'm not going to university anymore, and if I go back, it will be to write!"

The news of my leaving university genuinely shocked him, but he did not display disappointment.  I struggled to accept the role reversal between us, but it was almost impossible to feel comfortable.  I was the erudite one with a well defined future before I had quit university to indulge in the fun I saw him having.  He was the vagabond who got lost in night life. I'd never have expected him to quit his partying lifestyle to chase academia, though I always knew that in his mind he believed it to be "the right thing to do."

He told me of his looming exams and how nervous they made him.  To see him excel--and see him enjoy doing it--really made me proud.  Most people told me I was silly for loving a high school drop out, but I'd always known he was smarter than most--even when he was wrapped in drugs and alcohol.  

I was happy for him, but frustrated with myself.  His progress and my blatant lack of progress made me feel not good enough; a feeling I can't seem to escape no matter what role I assume.  

Between him scrambling across the floor to collect his scattered notes, and my teetering back and forth, our lips met.  We pulled away embarrassed, but a hot rush was already circulating my body.  I condensed it and shooed it away before euphoria got the best of me.  

It occurred to me that we would always be in a different place no matter what direction we chose to take in our lives.  No matter what I did to arrive on the same plateau as him, we'd always be on a different page.
I had a dream about this, and I wanted to write it down before I forgot about it. It's nothing fantastic because I was in a rush to document it all. The emotions were strong, but the images that accompanied them started to dissolve the moment I woke up, so this is the best I've got for now. If I decide it's worth revising, then I'll come back it in a few days. For now, I'm just glad I got it out of my head!
© 2012 - 2024 Hey-Ocean
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Mintamite's avatar
Why are the only things I can think of after reading your stuff "wow" and "brilliant"
??